How to Help Teens Who Think They Have It All Figured Out

What the "Finished" Horse Teaches Us About Growth Mindsets

In the horse world, people talk about the "finished" horse—one that’s fully trained and capable. But the truth is, no horse is ever truly finished. A horse that stops learning, growing, or being worked with doesn’t stay the same; it begins to regress.

The same is true for humans. The idea of being “finished” can limit progress, whether it’s a horse or a teenager. Embracing a growth mindset is essential to continual development.

Why Teens Believe They’ve “Arrived” (And How to Help Them Develop a Growth Mindset)

Most teenagers crave independence and freedom. From their perspective, they feel ready to take on the world. But as parents, we often see the gaps in their knowledge and experience.

I vividly remember being 16, driving my dad’s truck around Utah Lake. I thought I had everything figured out. Sure, there might be some small details I hadn’t learned, but I was confident I’d pick those up along the way. Looking back, I realize how much I didn’t know.

Teens who think they’ve “arrived” may not understand the value of growth. This mindset can stall their development and prevent them from reaching their full potential.

3 Proven Strategies to Encourage a Growth Mindset in Teens

1. Be a Role Model for Growth Mindsets

Your actions speak louder than words. Show your teen that personal growth is a lifelong journey.

• Share your own goals and challenges with them.
• Set family and individual goals together.
• Demonstrate that there's always something new to learn, no matter your age or stage in life.

2. Help Them Dream Bigger and See New Possibilities

Teens often limit their ambitions because they don’t see what’s possible

• Encourage them to dream beyond their current circumstances
• Teach them how to set meaningful goals and celebrate progress along the way.
• Make goal-setting a collaborative and enjoyable process.

3. Connect Them with Positive Mentors

Peers and mentors can have a powerful influence on teens.

• Introduce them to slightly older role models who embody growth and success.
• Consider involving coaches who can inspire them in unique ways.
• Encourage participation in programs like Stable Living, where teens and parents can find support and guidance.

The Danger of Thinking You’re “Finished”

When teens—or adults—believe they’ve arrived, they risk stagnation or even regression. Growth is an ongoing process. Even when you’re not actively working toward a goal, life is moving forward, and the world is changing.

Progress isn’t about perfection—it’s about consistently striving to become the best version of yourself.

Final Thoughts: Progress Is Infinite

The idea of being “finished” is a myth. Whether it’s a horse or a human, growth is infinite. Embrace the journey, encourage your teen to do the same, and remember: as long as you keep moving forward, you can’t fail.